Of, relating to, or affected by psychosis (auxillarypriest) wrote,
Of, relating to, or affected by psychosis
auxillarypriest

The dreaded UPS package debacle


Monday the 22nd 12:52AM CST

It all started out normally enough. I wanted a dvd-rom with dxr3 card for my computer, along with a few other items. I researched prices with my usual methods, and discovered what I needed for a great price from an online wholesaler. I proceeded to make the order or the dvd, a new ATX case with 400W power supply, and 512MB of PC133 SDRAM(for my parents)

Now it's a widely known fact that I am not the most patient person in the world. As soon as I woke up the next day I was online checking the progress of the shipments through ups.com with the supplied tracking numbers. I was ecstatic to see that the dvd would be arriving to me that same Friday, the ram and case were scheduled for the following Monday (but those aren't the items I really cared about anyways)

Friday the 26th 6:11PM CST

...so after a long day of sticking my head out the door looking for my dvd everytime my dogs barked, I became irritated that it was now past 6pm and I hadn't seen that shit colored UPS truck roll past my house. I went in my room and searched for my delivery status through my tracking number. To my dismay I saw that it was still in Cach, Illinois (near Chicago I think) but it was still scheduled for delivery. Thinking this was all a clerical error I called UPS and they told me that shipments went out until 7pm and it would probably be arriving any minute, if not they told me I should shut the fuck up and wait till Monday. So I sat at the door like a puppy waiting for his master to come home for the next hour... and guess what... no fucking dvd.

Monday the 29th 10:14AM CST

Well I just woke up after sleeping on the couch with something hard jammed into my side. I slept on the couch so there would be no chance I would miss the delivery of my dvd if it needed to be signed for. Needless to say it never arrived. I called up UPS to see why it was still in Illinois, less than an hour and a half from my home in Milwaukee. The friendly UPS csr informed me that my package was lost and "oops" nobody really knew about it. Now I'm pissed so I say to the lady - "Look here Jessica, this is a very important package that I need for a network server that was supposed to be installed on Friday. Here it's Monday and if I don't come through with this soon my ass is gonna be in a sling!" I knew that I had impressed her with my urgency, she was like butter in my hands. I could hear the smile in Jessica's voice "Sir, you're just gonna have to deal with that, if you want to find your package you need to contact the shipper and have them put out a trace on the package." Yes, that click was the sound of Jessica hanging up on me, and I seriously really was nice to her... maybe I shouldn't have called her a whore and insulted her grandmother... but I still think it was called for.

So basically here I am... dejected and discouraged by my run in with Jessica the evil customer service rep from the bowels of hell and dvd-less to top it off. I try calling the company that shipped me the dvd but of course nobody that works there speaks english so I end up hanging up. I call back UPS hoping that Jessica will answer again and I can ask her out in a proper manner for a date. Well it turns out some chick named Maria answers the phone and she s a sweetheart and blah blah blah. She ends up putting an urgent trace out on the package that she isn't supposedly supposed to do for the shipee only the shipper. So now I'm all confident that finally my dvd will arrive, when Maria, the shining life in my light informs me that an urgent trace can take up to 8 business days, and if they even find the package at all they will send me a letter via snail mail.

Tuesday the 30th 4PM CST

Now I'm on the phone to UPS for the 336th time in 1 week and I'm becoming more depressed which each phone call. Jessica answered the phone again and informed me that I should stop calling about my package because it generally takes at least 4 business days for any new information. She told me that she could see from her logs that I had called 336 times and that I needn't waste my time. I decided to call back anyways and the person who answered told me that my dvd was mis-routed and found in Maryland, at the Washington D.C. UPS hub and that it will be delivered Friday. I was so happy to hear that they found it that the fact it wasn't going to be here until Friday didn't bother until after I'd already hung up. I call back immediately and I ask if they can expedite the shipping since they fucked up so much already. They flat out informed me they wouldn't and then refused to allow me to speak to the supervisor. Oh well, at least it's coming.

Wednesday the 31st 2:33PM CST

Now the UPS website says my package will be delivered today.
The automated UPs phone line tells me the package will be delivered Friday.
The live UPS operator says it will be delivered tomorrow.

...Fuck it

PACKAGE PROGRESS
Date Time Location Activity
Oct 31, 2001 8:20 A.M. CACH, IL, US IN TRANSIT TO
8:19 A.M. BURTONSVILLE, MD, US DEPARTURE SCAN
Oct 30, 2001 10:12 P.M. BURTONSVILLE, MD, US ARRIVAL SCAN
9:22 P.M. DC SORT, MD, US DEPARTURE SCAN
6:49 P.M. DC SORT, MD, US ORIGIN SCAN
5:34 A.M. DC SORT, MD, US ROUTED INCORRECTLY AT UPS FACILITY;PKG HAS BEEN REROUTED TO DESTINATION
5:34 A.M. DC SORT, MD, US LOCATION SCAN
Oct 25, 2001 5:39 P.M. CACH, IL, US LOCATION SCAN
5:36 P.M. CACH, IL, US LOCATION SCAN
12:33 P.M. CACH, IL, US ARRIVAL SCAN
Oct 23, 2001 11:03 P.M. SWEETWATER HOUSTON, TX, US DEPARTURE SCAN
10:50 P.M. SWEETWATER HOUSTON, TX, US ARRIVAL SCAN
9:59 P.M. STAFFORD, TX, US DEPARTURE SCAN
8:25 P.M. STAFFORD, TX, US ORIGIN SCAN
7:19 P.M. US BILLING INFORMATION RECEIVED
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